Disclaimer to keep the ick away. Rin is nineteen - twenty-ish in this fic. Also, clearly not a mega-rich c**k-blocking author
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Rin looked at the barrels of soy sauce and pickles and wondered where she was going to put them. The store room, with what she'd once considered ample space, was full.
" The side kitchen," she finally said to Royokan, " it really is the only place available right now."
As the massive wolf demon picked up the barrels and stomped towards the back room, Rin looked in a sort of wondrous horror at the food she was supposed to prepare that night for the personal retainers of Sesshomaru. Overwhelming and it wasn't even taking into account the hoards of demons that did not have Sesshomaru's personal favour.
Normally Jakken would ask for something specific and she'd prepare it for him, something with pickles either in it or on the side no doubt. Sesshomaru, on the other hand, had never been seen eating in public nor had he asked her for anything to be prepared. She simply brought food up to his rooms and returned the empty plates back down.
It had started when she had confronted Jakken on supplies in her kitchen going missing. The small demon had angrily denied venturing into such a mundane place and huffed off. Further pondering had triggered a thought she'd initially rejected but which kept coming back to bother her.
' Sesshomaru?'
She'd never seen him eat in all her years with him, but he obviously had to at sometime in order to survive.
To test out her theory she'd prepared a dish of rice and fish but had found it untouched in the same spot the next morning. Initially thinking that it proved her wrong she took it back and fed it to Jakken. Taking a closer look at her supplies the next morning she realized that she'd overlooked the most important element. It wasn't fish or rice that had gone missing...it'd been red meat.
The next night Rin snuck to Sesshomaru's rooms deep within the castle he'd constructed with a bowl of beef and left it in his front chamber.
The bowl had been empty the next morning.
Every morning after Rin had provided Sesshomaru with some sort of beef dish. She'd tried to mix some vegetables in but quite frankly the majority of times they'd been lying wilted in the bowl when she'd gone for the dishes. There really wasn't a point in wasting them. Feeding Sesshomaru, Jakken and herself hadn't been that big of a task at first. Sesshomaru clearly didn't need to eat as often as everyone else. Even feeding the growing number of personal retainers who'd come asking hadn't required too much effort but every few months they had to stockpile the essentials that had been plundered or grown and that always took up a lot of time...and room. Not to mention how messy things tended to be in the hassle of getting the cavernous storage rooms filled and processing some of the haul into a more storable form.
She blushed remembering the way she'd looked when Sesshomaru had appeared to check on progress earlier that day. Blood everywhere, little bits of raw meat scattered across the massive cutting board and all across her front, she'd been horrified he'd seen her like that. She refused to think about the thousands of times he'd seen her dirtier in the years she'd been living with him. Lately each time he'd caught her looking disheveled it felt like it was the first time she'd really been aware of his presence.
*Sigh*
She turned back to the massive cutting board in front of her, piled with root vegetables and brandished her cleaver. Time to take out frustrations in her traditional manner.
THUNK
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Sesshomaru walked the long dark corridors of his palace in silence. Although construction was not yet complete the compound was already huge. Each day an increasing number of lesser demons flocked to him in the hopes of getting positions in this strong court while there were any still available. Jakken, luckily, took care of most of such requests by either granting them the pleasure of serving him, or sending them back the way they'd come. Sesshomaru was usually either paying visits upon some of the more powerful demons in his lands or overseeing the addition of any palace projects.
Despite being a distance from the kitchen he could still smell Rin's cooking and he reminded himself that although Rin's cooking was more then adequate for Jakken and himself, and the lesser demons could hunt their own prey or starve for all he cared, that wouldn't be the case forever and he'd have to have Jakken look into getting some captives trained and in place for the host of lower noble demons that would clamour for the service. Cooking was beneath Rin's position in this budding empire anyway, though he might have her continue for him and herself to ensure a level of security. Poison wouldn't kill him, but if the right one found its way through it could render him helpless and Rin didn't have a fraction of his resistance. Despite being only a mere human she was Sesshomaru's personal charge and her protection was his concern. Any rumors that she was more then a charge were swiftly squelched beneath the heel of Sesshomaru's shoe. Jakken, he had noted, was whispering things with the other gossip mongers lately and knew full well what the small demon was likely saying.
{Doubting my words, he irks me more each day}
It was true that finding that first set of dishes waiting for him had initially caused a flash of unexpected emotion but Sesshomaru had smothered it, attributing the unexpected emotion to the fact that he'd become woefully unaccustomed to being treated with the grace and sensitivity that was deserving of his rank. At first he'd gamely ignored such dishes that offended his nose but then he'd come in to find a bowl full of beef and he'd been lost in his weakness for it.
He'd found assorted beef dishes waiting for him whenever he departed or arrived since and considering his erratic schedule, how she managed to get a hot bowl to his room while it was still fresh defied even his knowledge.
Taking his customary route past the kitchens on his way to his chambers he stopped for a moment outside the door. No had ever caught the great lord hiding behind the door, listening to the human girl mumble about the great pickle thief Jakken, and no one ever would. Approaching his door he caught the now familiar smell of seasoned meat waiting for him. Scooping up the tray waiting on a counter, he walked down the hallway that wound its way to his inner rooms. There he set the dishes on a small table near his bed and removed his armor, then his robs, leaving on only his under leggings. He shook his head vigorously and then ran his hand through his bangs reveling in the unfettered movement that the lack of armor provided.
Lounging back against his pillows, Sesshomaru picked up the bowl of rice and started picking meat out of the side while he contemplated his work. Someday it would surely rival his fathers in terms of size and prestige. Just as surely he would keep the type of rabble that had risen against his father out. For while he didn't have a human mate he did have a human charge and that was already causing as much grumbling among the ranks. Soft footsteps from the chambers next to his broke his thoughts and he listened as he heard Rin move from room to room, allowing himself a brief smile as he heard her open and close the heavy door to her bathing room.
Rin's rooms had been placed next to his for protection. Any demon that dared intrude this far into his castle and threaten the life of one of his vassals would be far too much for Rin to handle and deserved the honor of dying at Sesshomaru's hands. So far no one had felt strongly enough about the human girl to openly risk death on his claws and he doubted anyone allowed into his court would be foolish enough to contemplate an attack here.
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Rin sighed with pleasure as she slipped into the hot bath. The heat soaked into her muscles soothed away a days worth of aches caused by wrangling barrels into place. Though, she had to admit, she'd had help with most of the heavy lifting and Jakken had stayed away from the pickle barrels for most of the day.
{Though the little thief took more then I had thought at first}
She sunk completely into the water and enjoyed, as always, the warm tingling it caused on the top of her scalp. Today had been a good day, an extra good one in fact. It was so rare these days to have Sesshomaru home. She loved the kitchen but she'd gladly trade it for the old life, or even just to have Sesshomaru around more. It seemed like so long ago that she'd been alone with Sesshomaru and Jakken, traveling the lands together.
She pushed up to the top of the tub, shaking her hair from her eyes as she surfaced from the water. Relaxing against the side she let herself go limp.
{I must admit though, knowing when and where your next bath is coming from is a definite plus}
Rin floated in the tub soaking up the heat from the water until her fingers and toes puckered. Climbing out she shook her feet off as she lifted them out of the tub. Once standing she pulled her hair back from her face and gave herself a drying shake. Once, just once, when she was still very small she'd caught a glimpse of Sesshomaru rising out of a hot spring like some pale god out of the mist. The image was ruined when he'd given in to the instinct and given himself an all over shake. She'd promptly started trying to emulate him and it'd taken years to master, but she'd gotten good at it.
Slipping into a light robe before moving onto her bed. She flopped down onto the blankets amidst the mounds of pillows and allowed herself the happy thought that Sesshomaru was separated from her by only a few feet of walls. Sighing at the thought that the days of taking comfort in his closeness were over, she crawled to the top of the futon and snuggled down under the silk sheets.
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The noise startled Sesshomaru from his musings. Despite expecting it, it never stopped surprising him slightly when it happened. Perhaps, he wondered, because he hoped it wouldn't come. The cry of terror from the next room caused him to rise in a smooth motion from his bed and stalk over to a large hanging scroll that hid a small escape route from her room to his. He quickly crossed the short distance and entered her room, walking smoothly over to the bed where the girl lashed out against hidden tormentors that plagued her sleep. Settling himself on the edge of her mattress he reached out with one smooth hand and placed it against her forehead. Immediately the cries and flailing ceased, though she still whimpered and the worry lines of her brow were still deeply indented in her skin.
Gently Sesshomaru slid his body onto the blankets next to her, stretching his legs out and positioning his arms to prop him up so he could look at her while he stroked her hair. The whimpering stopped as Rin rolled over towards the warm body and snuggled against his chest. Worry lines remained etched upon her forehead but they were slowly starting to fade away under the soft stroke of his thumb.
Having the warm body pressed up against him was a distraction. Everything she did was a distraction. The problem was that as soon as he started thinking about getting rid of the distraction his mind went to a different subject. He didn't like that either. His mind was his tool and yet it refused to think about the issue. He'd finally figured a logical reason why. Years of patience had shown that she provided valuable service and getting rid of her would be foolish. She provided not only a temporary cook but a loyal servant and someone to whom Jakken had actually opened up to, freeing him of having the little demon keep trying to open up to him. The last part Sesshomaru could arguably be the most thankful for.
The feel of Rin wrapping her arms around his waist pulled him back to reality, startling him at how easily he'd, again, slipped from his constant vigilance. Holding very still and observing her breathing he determined she was still asleep.
He was almost tempted to stay.
Being like this with Rin always caused him this problem. It created a fear in his heart he would end up like his father. The fact that the fear that something should happen to Rin outweighed his fear for rebellion caused him even more. If he slipped into such a depraved cycle of destruction he would never be strong enough to hold up the Western Lands. His hand stopped stroking the now smooth forehead and tucked stray hairs back from her open mouth.
Her nightmares concerned him and he sincerely wished they would cease. Giving in to this secret pleasure was not worth the fact that Rin was in torment beforehand. He rose slowly from the bed and walked towards the tapestry that hid her side of the tunnel.
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Rin lay in bed listening to the barely audible footsteps that were moving away from her. She'd woken up to the smell of Sesshomaru and the feel a warm body getting out of her bed.
{This has to be a dream}
She rolled over and opened her eyes to look into the darkness of her room. The chair that she'd put in front of the hidden entryway was slightly out of position but that could be explained. Rin sat up and walked over to the entryway and slid aside the painting scroll that was hanging in front of it. She hated the idea that she was bending it but Sesshomaru had merely looked at her blankly when she protested that it was silly to cover up the entryway.
" Senseless girl," Jakken had cried, " your lord gives you more protection than you deserve and you'd flaunt it everywhere? The other lords would be scandalized. Be grateful that he's giving you as much as he has and do as he wishes."
So the scroll had gone up and Rin had tried to not focus that if she just moved it aside...
Now Rin had actually moved the scroll and scooted slowly across cold stone floor towards his side. She paused right before Sesshomaru's scroll, hesitating at awakening him if he was sleeping.
" What is it Rin?"
She sighed.
{Doesn't he ever sleep?}
She pushed the scroll aside.
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Apparently he had been careless in his assessment if Rin had awoken. He waited as she pushed aside the wall covering and stepped towards him. From where he lounged on the futon her hair was disheveled and her robe was wrinkled and looked slightly open at the front and yet she still didn't look...displeasing. He'd give himself that much.
" My lord you're awake," Rin said, moving over to sit at the edge of his bed. " I had hoped you'd be asleep by now."
Rin was the only person in the entire castle who'd dare to approach him and then sit on his bed without permission. Any other being and he'd have scarred their face in the most casual manner but he couldn't do that to Rin. She was human and fragile and he had to admit she'd never done anything that was purposefully arrogant.
" So you come into my room when you hope I'm asleep?" He shifted to sit with his left leg extended.
" No my lord," she looked at the bed and then back up, " forgive me but I thought I heard my lord in my room."
Ah, so she hadn't caught him lying next to her then. Perhaps it was the lack of warmth when he moved that had caused her to awaken.
" You were making the loudest noises. I came to see what was causing you distress. It appeared it was nothing more then a bad dream."
She sat for a moment, thinking, before turning to him.
" I'm sorry for causing such trouble."
He narrowed his eyes and turned so that his profile was to her.
" Don't be foolish."
She smiled.
" Are you not tired?"
" No."
She scooted herself up onto the bed and folded her legs underneath her. He gave her a look and she reconsidered for a moment before scooting up to his side and curling up against him.
" Rin it's no longer appropriate that you sleep near me."
She opened her eyes and looked up at him with a wane smile.
" I know. I won't stay for long."
He refused to acknowledge the tiny feeling in the back of his head that wanted to keep her there. It was beneath him.
" As you wish," he stated, keeping his eyes firmly ahead.
He really should be more firm with her. She took leaves that he wouldn't have granted his most favored courtesan though he'd had yet to actually have her do anything senseless in public. He generally didn't tolerate such fragile and weak things around, so the fact that he'd let a human live near him had caused quite a few words to be said behind his back and the fact that she was female had caused the more foolish to question exactly how much like his father he was.
Looking to his side he realized that Rin had fallen asleep despite her assurances.
Her face had none of the lines or fear that it had shown earlier and if he didn't know better he'd believe that her face couldn't show such distress. Her mouth slightly open and lying on her side, she had her knees curled up to her chest and her hands loosely folded in front of her. The top of her head was close to his hip and he dryly observed a small trickle of drool coming out of her mouth.
Typical human.
He stifled the sigh that grew in his chest. He'd been doing that far too often lately and he was in need of rest and he couldn't bring himself to let his guard down around anyone, even if that someone was asleep and drooling.
Despite the fact that he could easily move her to her room if he so desired he couldn't quite work up the motivation. He tilted his head back to rest on a large cushion and stared at the ceiling. The smooth whiteness pleased him. He'd worked hard for all that surrounded him. He'd had to rely a bit more on physical intimidation in some cases then he had wanted to originally when he decided to speed up his plans for the empire. Jakken's fearful voice came back to him
" I don't know why she said such things my lord. I have no idea why Rin of all people would think about death at a time like this my lord, forgive me my lord, I'll find out."
" Don't bother," he'd said curtly, dismissing Jakken to scamper to the other side of the campsite. A few moments later a small Rin came stumbling back into the campsite from relieving herself in the woods. She rubbed her eyes tiredly and headed over towards Ah-nun for the night.
" Rin come here."
She froze and then walked over to him and sat on her knees next to him.
" Yes Sesshomaru-sama?"
" Your words earlier, explain them."
She stared at him for a moment. Biting her lip she looked at the sky and then back at Sesshomaru.
" Which ones my lord?"
" The foolish ones."
Her face brightened and she bopped a tiny fist into a tiny hand.
" Ah! Yes, see Jakken was talking about your empire. He said," her voice turned sad, " that I would be dead by the time you set yours up so...so I wanted you to remember me even though you'll have all that nice stuff."
She yawned, hastily covering it with a hand and looked at Sesshomaru sheepishly before she got the thoughtful expression on her face again.
" Will you my lord?"
He looked to the side again.
" Don't be foolish."
A snort interrupted his reflections and he looked down at the twitching Rin. She appeared to be mumbling a bit and shifted so that her legs splayed out across the futon. He raised his eyebrow. As polite as any of the human princesses in public, Rin always reverted to her open and fun loving self when she was assured of privacy. He closed his eyes. He really should get some rest if he was to be at full mental capacity in the morning and he didn't have to fully sleep to be able to get that rest. He stifled a cross between a sigh and a yawn as he stretched and relaxed his head backwards. He could discuss Rin's new placement in the court with her in the morning...
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