Masquerade
By Baine
Chapter 1/1
Written & Posted October 31, 2004
Canon: PGSM Characters
This hasn’t been edited, since no one is online. Sorry, everyone! But still! So you’re your candy bags ready and I’ll drop this tasty little treat into it! Happy Halloween, minna! Oh, and thanks to PHUT! for being my partner in crime in the fact that he also wrote a Halloween story on my request when I challenged the Shingestu Board. Wheet! Plus he answered a couple of questions that cropped up as I wrote, because I didn’t want to go too OOC. Sorry for any rustiness in my writing; I haven’t written anything lately. It really didn’t go the way I expected at all, either. I wanted it to be all uplifting and stuff. Poo. Also, to me, it sort of feels...really slapped together, since I wrote it so fast. Sorry!
Anyhow, enjoy!
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Masquerade
By Baine
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She stared down at the red mask clutched in her hand, her grip tightening as she looked up into the mirror and stared at herself. Her once-bright eyes were now haunted, the bags hanging underneath them making her appear older than she was. Her hair was falling out of the ponytail she had hastily shoved it into after her shower and was now drying in all sorts of odd angles.
Not that any of it mattered. Nobody would be seeing her, anyway. If they did, she’d just say she was dressing up as an idol who was having a bad hair-day. It was Halloween, after all. And, really, that was part of the problem. Everyone else was out having fun and laughing and just...enjoying one another’s company, while she was holding herself aloof in this tiny little apartment.
It wasn’t that she wasn’t welcome. The other girls had gone out of their way to make her feel welcome. They wanted to include her in their group. At first, she had thought it was because they had found out that she was an idol. She looked back down at the red mask balled in her fist. That’s why she’d begun wearing the stupid mask in the first place.
True, whenever she would henshin, she was disguised to the point where even her hair changed color. That wasn’t enough anymore, though. The enemy saw right through her. Surely others would as well, especially the paparazzi, since they were used to seeing idols in disguise. That’s why she’d made a mask. True, you could tell that it looked handmade, but that was okay because you couldn’t see the girl behind the mask. With her mask on, she felt free to become someone else, to become powerful and have a purpose in life that superceded all else.
Her burden was lighter once Luna began finding the other girls, but she still had to distance herself. She knew things that they didn’t. She remembered the past. She remembered the way the Moon Kingdom was destroyed when nobody else could. It was imperative that the past didn’t repeat itself. Not that things were going as planned, of course. The enemy had seen right through her disguise to begin with, and all of the girls officially knew who she was, though, thankfully, they didn’t advertise it to the world. After all, wouldn’t it have looked suspicious if four random girls suddenly befriended Aino Minako out of the blue? Unfortunately, ceasing to talk about the past hadn’t stopped it from reoccurring. Usagi was starting to become the Princess more frequently now. Eventually, she would get to the point where she couldn’t control herself and the world would be doomed once more.
Worse of all, there was nothing she could do about it. Not now. She wasn’t in any sort of condition to even attempt to save Usagi from herself anymore. She was getting sicker each day. Her lapses were occurring on a regular basis now. She didn’t tell anyone how frequent they were, not even Artemis. She would just pretend that she was resting or watching TV. If by chance she did fall into a faint, he’d merely think she was napping. It wasn’t hard to trick that cat, especially if he was sleepy with a belly full of warm milk. Today, she hadn’t even been able to transform. Her powers were so weak that she couldn’t even try to help protect the world anymore. Her identity had been stripped away from her.
Who was she now? She had lost the ability to be Sailor Venus. She was fading fast as Aino Minako. She was cutting her strings left and right. She had even kicked Artemis out after realizing that she was no longer a senshi. She wasn’t really friends with any of the girls. It was her own fault, really. She’d done nothing but keep them all at arm’s length in the entire time that they had known one another. In fact, when they had found out her identity, they went into fan-mode. It had reminded her of yet another reason why she couldn’t be friends with everyone. After getting to know them, though, she realized that the girls respected her and that it wasn’t the fact that she was an idol steering them towards being nice to her.
But still. She just...couldn’t bring herself to reciprocate the feelings. Now it wasn’t so much that she didn’t want to. Not anymore. The past would reoccur whether she liked it or not. At this point, if she got too close to the other girls, they’d get hurt when they found out that she was dying. She didn’t want them grieving over her, especially not after everything she had put them through. She wasn’t worth it. Those girls had so much warmth in their hearts, and her heart was full of nothing but skepticism.
It was harder now, too. She knew them so much better than she had before. She saw the way they all got along and communicated. She saw the love they had for each other...the love that they would gladly bestow upon her if she only gave them a sign. There were so many times that she had been tempted to cave in, but that would be selfish. It would only benefit herself in the end. They wouldn’t quit trying, though. They had invited her to Motoki’s Halloween party. Not that she’d have been able to go anyway, since she’d cause quite a stir the moment she set foot in the door.
But...wait. She looked up into the mirror. Aino Minako would create a stir if she went to the party, but...what if she went in disguise? She could go incognito. If she was covered from head to foot, who would know that it was her who lurked behind the mask? A mask could preserve her identity once more. She wouldn’t even have to tell the girls that it was her. She could pretend to be a random person and just...hang out with them and pretend that everything was okay in the world. Just for now. Just for one night. After all, isn’t that what Halloween was all about? To let go of your fears and step into somebody else’s shoes for a night? She wouldn’t be a famous idol running from the crowd. She wouldn’t be a senshi who had failed at her job. She could be free. The mask that hid her from the world now represented freedom.
She nodded in determination. She could do this. Correction. She WOULD do this. Now the only question that remained was what to be. She dropped her red mask, and it fluttered to the floor, coming to rest as though it were a drop of blood that now lay in a puddle at her feet. This mask, her sole friend when she had begun her mission, could assist her no more. Too many people knew that it was Venus associated with the mask, hence, that it was Aino Minako. She didn’t want anyone knowing who she was. Not tonight.
She grabbed a nearby costume catalog from her desk. Pages rustled and tore as she quickly flipped through them. No, no, maybe, no---wait, perfect! She slowly pulled out her cellphone and snapped a picture, then used the phone to cloak herself in the costume. Her clothes melted away and were replaced by black silk. A plastic mask covered her face, and her hair was hidden by a black hood. She turned back to the mirror and swallowed hard. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all. Who would want to talk to her if she was dressed as death itself? A moment ago, it was a great idea. After all, if the Grim Reaper was on his way to meet her, then shouldn’t she welcome his arrival with open arms? Shouldn’t she get used to his presence now so that she wouldn’t be scared when encountering him for the first time?
The mask was so hot, though. She couldn’t even breathe. She lifted her left hand and began pulling it off, but it got stuck. The heat intensified, and she lifted her other hand to pull as well, dropping her staff, which fell against the mirror and cracked it. She pulled the mask off and tossed it across the room, catching sight of her fragmented face in the broken mirror. She was so white that it was as though she had slathered herself with baby powder. She didn’t like the fact that her face was being reflected back at her from so many angles, each shard of glass intent on capturing her image. Her hand rose to her head, and she grew even paler before falling to the floor in a dead faint, her forgotten mask disappearing underneath her, no longer able to protect her from the horrors of the world.
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Finished October 31, 2004
(Like it? Hate it? I’m the one to talk to! Email lady_baine@yahoo.com today!)
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