"You know what would be really hot?"
The quartet of schoolgirls sitting around Aino Minako all simultaneously cringed at these fateful words. They knew that they had no one but themselves to blame for the lapse in conversation that had prompted to blonde's mind to fly to, where else, the gutter and come up with yet another sexual some-such that would no doubt make at least one of them ill. After all, they had all been down this road before. This was hardly the first time Minako had said such a thing, and it would most certainly not be the last. But it didn't make it any less painful.
Still, they all knew that ignoring her, talking over her, or running away from her would do no good. So it was with a heavy heart that Makoto shut her eyes and braced herself for the answer to the following question. "What, Minako-chan?"
"Mamoru-san and Motoki-kun."
Usagi perked up as she had a tendency to do with her beloved, completely ignoring how Ami choked on her soda, prompting Makoto to slap her on the back. Ami had of course explained to her that this was more harmful than helpful, but Makoto and the others kept doing it anyway.
"What about Mamo-chan and Motoki-kun, Minako?" Usagi asked innocently.
Minako looked at her as if this was the simplest concept in the world and was quite surprised that it seemed only Ami had caught on. "Having sex of course."
Rei did a rather unladylike spit-take while Usagi simply took to shrieking in complete and utter horror. Makoto was in so much shock that she stopped slapping Ami on the back, giving the girl the opportunity to breathe again.
"What is my Mamo-chan doing with Motoki-kun?!" Usagi seethed, getting to her feet and slapping her palms on the table.
Minako giggled, rolling her eyes cutely, entirely oblivious to the horror she had created around her. "I'm not saying they're actually doing the nasty, Usagi. I just think it would be hot, that's all."
"How?" Usagi asked, horrified.
"Minako-chan, where did you get this idea from?" Rei asked, trying to be diplomatic. It was very hard to be diplomatic when the vein on her neck was bulging and her nails were digging into her palms, but she decided to try anyway.
Minako shrugged. "I don't know. I was just thinking about it." Suddenly her eyes lit up again. Ami had to physically stop herself from diving under the table as this could not mean anything good. "You know what would be even better? Mamoru-san and Demando-sama!"
"WHAT?!" Usagi shouted, all the blood draining from her face. "Minako, that's... that's just gross!"
"C'mon! Lighten up!" Minako instructed flippantly. "Just think of how amazing the sex would be. All that pent up anger and hatred... Angry sex is the best!" Minako paused, twirling her hair around her fingers and affecting as innocent a look as possible. "Or so I hear."
"Nightmares," Ami muttered to herself, covering her ears in a vein attempt to block out Minako's voice. "I am going to have nightmares. Dirty, dirty, filthy nightmares."
"Actually those are called wet--"
"MINAKO-CHAN!" the girls all chorused in horror.
"What?" Minako flipped her hair a bit. "Honestly, I don't see what the big deal is. It's not like I'm saying Umino-kun and Mamoru-san should hook up." Minako paused again, tapping a finger on her chin. "Although Tuxedo Umino-san and Tuxedo Kamen-sama would make a very nicely dressed couple."
Rei let her head fall forward onto the table and moaned, "Someone gouge out my eyes. I don't want them anymore."
"Why is Minako-chan trying to break Mamo-chan and I up?" Usagi asked sadly.
Makoto shrugged, casting Minako would could have been a vaguely amused look. "Insanity?"
"Hey now--" Minako began, hands on hips.
"Hi, girls," a familiar male voice called. All turned to see Mamoru walking towards them, waving casually. "What's going on?"
Ami instantly turned beet red and dove under the table. Makoto immediately set about to trying to drag her out again. Rei absolutely refused to lift her head, tensing up at the sound of his voice.
Minako simply smiled and said, "Hey Mamoru-san! I was just saying how--"
"WE'RE LEAVING!" Usagi shouted, practically flying out of the booth and latching on to her beloved boyfriend's arm. She looked up at him earnestly and said, her lower lip trembling, "Mamo-chan... Motoki-kun?" With that she proceeded to drag a very, very confused Mamoru out of Crown Arcade.
Minako looked around at the chaos she had caused, utterly bewildered by it. Eventually she shrugged and leaned forward to take another sip from her soda. But not before she got in one last final thought.
"Do you think Mamoru-san would be a top or a bottom?"
