A/N- Well, here we are again! I hope you guys like this chapt!
Disclaimer- I don't own Fruba, but I love playing with the characters!
'Thoughts'
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Chapter 5
Regrets and Fears
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Hatori couldn’t believe his eyes, he’d been sitting in his office when Akito burst in yet again but this time he had someone with him, but Hatori hadn’t expected it to be Tohru Honda of all people.
“Hatori, I want you to go to Shigure’s and get all of Miss. Honda’s belongings and bring them here, she’s moving in.” A smile broke out on Akito’s face and Hatori felt a shiver run up his spine as he gulped unconsciously.
After a moment though, Hatori’s eyes drifted over to Tohru only to find that she wasn’t looking at him, she was looking at the floor with an unreadable expression on her face.
Confused and concerned, Hatori gave Akito a measuring look, “what brought this up all of a sudden Akito?” Akito narrowed his eyes as the smile disappeared from his face, “I do not need to explain anything to you Hatori, just do as I have told you, that’s all you need to know.”
Deeming this the end to the conversation, Akito tightened his grip upon Tohru’s hand before turning and stomping back out the door. After leading Tohru back across the garden and to his personal house, Akito slowly released her hand as he turned to face her.
“Well that went well…Tohru? Tohru, what is it? What’s wrong?” Concerned, Akito reached out a hand and lifted Tohru’s head only to find her lovely eyes swirling with fear and what looked to be shame as well.
Tohru didn’t know what to tell Akito as he looked into her eyes, she felt her stomach clench in pain at the memory of what she had just done, but seeing the trusting look in his eyes made her want to tell him.
“I…I’m scared Akito…I, I think the others will hate me now. We should have just told them the truth, now…I don’t know what to do…” her voice was low and Akito could hear the stressed tone to it.
Not knowing what else to do, Akito lead Tohru the rest of the way back to his house, once they were alone and with no prying eyes to bother them then Akito would talk to her, only then.
He had a reputation to uphold after all.
It took a few moments before both Tohru and himself were behind closed doors, releasing Tohru’s hand slowly, Akito walked over to his futon and watched as Tohru continued to stand, her soft eyes focused upon her feet.
Feeling his worry only deepen, Akito sat down and rested his arms upon his folded legs, “Tohru…what is really bothering you?”
Jerking where she stood, Tohru closed her eyes as she turned her head away, her hands fisted at her sides. ‘I knew that some day I would have to tell someone…that someday I would need to open up, but…can I?’
Akito could only wait and hope that Tohru would deal with her demons soon, normally he’d yell or throw something in anger for not getting an immediate answer, but this was Tohru and he would do what it took to get her to trust him completely, even if it meant waiting in silence for an eternity.
Feeling his face flush at his own thoughts, Akito licked his suddenly dry lips as he averted his eyes to the window nearby, ‘what is happening to me…why do I suddenly feel so worried and so scared, what is this?!’
Minutes passed as they both refrained from moving or talking, but as a half hour went by the silence had become too much to bare.
Steeling himself, Akito opened his mouth only to clamp it shut when Tohru’s low voice filled the room, it was so low that Akito had to strain his ears just to hear it.
"I didn't say goodbye, I had been up late the night before and had missed her when she left to go to work. The acident happened in a matter of seconds and in those seconds, she died...I lost her...I was all alone..." trembling with all the emotions that she had bottled up, Tohru sank to the ground and burried her face in her hands.
"She died and I lived...I don't know how long I was there, all I knew was that this was the only way that I could be near her. I didn't eat, I hardly slept and when I did I had nightmare's. It was my fault that she was killed and I did nothing to save her, I was to blame..."
Akito felt his body begin to shake as Tohru's pained voice washed over him, no longer was Tohru smiling and kind, no...she was lying on the floor but a few feet away. Her body shook as she curled herself into a ball and Akito felt his gut twist in syimpethy.
Knowing that there had to be something he could do to comfort her, Akito rose to his feet and walked over to her still trembling form, kneeling behind her Akito slowly streached out a hand and brushed the back of her head gently. When this didn't seem to work, Akito knew that he'd have to do the one thing that he had never done in his life.
Gripping Tohru's shoulder's Akito turned her to face him and lifted her as gently as he could, taking a deep breath he slowly encircled her in his arms and pulled her against his chest, hugging her.
But as soon as their bodies touched, both Tohru and Akito felt something stir in their blood as a light began to slowly engulf them, within moments the light had become phantom flames that danced around them both.
Tohru was confused and as she looked to Akito for an answer she saw something that nearly made her heart stop. From Akito's back, a pair of pitch black wings had sprouted and their tips were the color of flame.
Akito must have heard her gasp because he looked into her eyes and found that she was looking behind him, worried Akito turned and saw his wings, just as Tohru had and it shocked him to the core. 'I transform too? But...how...how is this possible? I thought that I was god, that I only controled the other's, how can I be one of them?'
Feeling her fingers itch to touch his wings, Tohru gave Akito a pleading look, "m...may I?" His body trembling, Akito felt his face flush as he heasitantly nodded his head in aproval.
Smiling softly, Tohru slowly reached out with numb fingers and ran her digits over the right wings feathers. A giggle burrbled up in her chest at how smoothe it felt to the touch, "it's so soft, I didn't know that you transformed too Akito. Why didn't you tell me?"
Jerking, Akito looked away, feeling anger beginning to knot in the pit of his stomach. "I...I didn't know that I could. You are the first woman that I have ever hugged...no one told me that I was one of the zodiac litterally. They are going to pay for this, whoever kept this a secret from me will pay dearly."
Gulping in slight fear at the look that had now entered Akito's eyes, Tohru gripped his shoulder as she flashed him a weary smile, "it's not that bad. I mean, these wings really do suit you Akito. Uh...heh, gomen, I didn't mean to..." Tohru was cut off from her rambling when Akito narrowed his eyes at her.
'Is she really that ignorant? Doesn't she know what this means? But by the look on her face right now, I guess not...'
Shifting, Tohru released Akito's shoulder and droped her hands limply into her lap. She adverted her eyes, looking at a wall across the room, not wishing to make Akito any angryier at her than he already was. "I...I'm sorry Akito...it wasn't my place to say anything."
Wincing at the broken and meek sound to Tohru's voice, Akito shifted uncomfortably for a moment, not quite knowing what he was supposed to do at a moment like this. He was after all still new to all this emotion stuff and he didn't want to hurt Tohru's feelings anymore than he had already, but he just couldn't stand to see her so dejected.
"It's alright. I..." sighing, Akito scratched his neck, "I really didn't mind, please, continue Tohru. What else do you think of this new feature of mine?"
'Please just let his work, I don't know how much more of this I can take.'
Happy that Akito was trying to make her feel better, Tohru turned towards him and saw the slight pink that had begun to tinge his cheeks, which only brought a smile to her lips. Lifting her hand once again, Tohru cupped Akito's cheek this time instead of his wing and ran her thumb in a small circle over his smooth skin.
"I think it shows more of the real you Akito. I know that you have dealt with alot and that you feel like you are the sorce of everyone's curse and unhappiness. But Akito, your not." Akito felt the breath leave his body as he looked into Tohru's soft eyes, they were filled to the brim with joy and he found that he just couldn't look away.
"As my mother used to say, 'everyone can be selfish at times, but it is the one's that sacrifice everything for other's, that are truely blessed.' So you see, these wings make you special Akito and nothing can ever take that away from you."
As she paused to let Akito take in her words, Tohru's eyes caught sight of something that was just below Akito's left ear. It was black as the bulk of Akito's feather's and looked to be a tatoo of some sort.
It was shaped liked a pheonix that was curling in on it's self and Tohru couldn't stop herself from brushing her finger's against it. But as soon as her finger's made contact, the black disolved into flame's and the entire building about them began to tremble. It was as if there was an earthquake occuring at that very moment in time.
Akito went stock still as he felt Tohru touch his neck and the feeling that rushed through his whole form made even his very soul cry out for more of that feeling, more of that touch, more of Tohru.
Jerking her hand back in a split second, Tohru was stunned as the earthquake subsided immediately, leaving a thuroughly shocked Tohru with a panting Akito. Just noticing that fact, Tohru sprung into action.
"Akito, are you alright? I didn't hurt you, did I?" Bending closer to his heaving form when he had failed to answer her, Tohru pressed the back of her hand to his forehead and found that he was hot to the touch. Feeling worry flood her, Tohru looked about the room and sighted a small water basin.
Hoping there was water in it, Tohru quickly got to her feet and ran over to it. Seeing just a little, Tohru ripped at the sleve of her uniform and dipped it into the water before hurrying back to Akito's side.
Placing a hand on his shoulder, Tohru guided him to where he was lying upon his side with his head in her lap. With this acomplished, Tohru placed the cool cloth on his forehead and ran her hand gently over his wings in an attempt to soothe him.
'He has a fever and it's all my fault. I must have done something...I shouldn't have let him hug me, none of this would have happened if I hadn't gotten him all stressed out. I'm such a fool...' "oh Akito...I'm sorry. This is all my fault, I shouldn't have made you do so much. I am so sorry..."
Akito had heard her words and wanted to comfort her but he was finding it hard to just stay consious. His head was pounding and his heart, his heart just wouldn't stop beating so hard. He didn't know what was wrong with him but he could almost swear it had something to do with Tohru running her soft and gentle hands over his body.
"It's...alright..." Tohru stilled as Akito's wavering voice reached her ears, "don't...worry...about...it..." unable to say anything more, Akito felt himself drifting off to sleep and in a last burst of energy, he gripped her nearby hand and was out like a light.
Tears of worry and fear filled Tohru's eyes as she gripped Akito's hand back, lacing their finger's together as she gazed down at his now slumbering form, "why Akito? Why me?"
She just couldn't understand why Akito had chosen her to open up to and her to trust, but she was greatful that he had, for it made her feel more alive than she had felt in a long time. 'I don't know what I did to deserve your trust Akito, but I swear that I will never leave you and I will find some way to pay you back for all that you have already done for me.'
Just as she was about to brush some of the stray hair from his face, there was a sudden knock at the door and a voice that caused Tohru to freeze in place, "Akito? Akito, are you in there? Akito!"
It was Hatori and he sounded angry.
