A week after departing from Slena, Hitomi kept to her one-word answers. She wasn't going to let anyone know what was bothering and someone somewhere was probably laughing about it. The group of travelers had made a routine stop for the horses to rest and for man and beast alike to find a tree in which to lift a leg. Hitomi sat like a statue in the carriage, not moving and claiming, again, that she was 'fine'.
"Maybe they put a spell on her and it's all she can say. Perhaps the real her is trapped within that shell crying out for help, but all she can say is 'I'm fine' when she really wants to say 'help me! Help me!'. What a life to lead!" Armand gushed.
Van sighed.
Jill teared up.
Hitomi's muscles were tired and sore. She was only tense around Van and since she was nearly always around him, she was always tense. It hurt to constantly be on guard around him, but what else could she do?
Once she learned what Van really was, she couldn't get herself to relax. To think! She had earnestly started to like him and it turned out to be a joke. Was Armand in on this? The woman who she talked with seemed to insist he was, that Armand knew, but did his best to do damage control so no one would ever know the truth about his beloved lord.
It was the right thing to do! She didn't want to get entangled up with someone like—like that. So why did she feel like a weed that had just been trampled?
Hitomi knew exactly why and it only made her feel worse.
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"Lord Van!" Merle came, at a full sprint, and barely gave Van enough warning to prepare himself for impact. The teenage neko purred loudly as she squeezed her lord as tightly as she possibly could. Van returned the embrace, but with less strength.
"You're home," she squeaked and then caught sight of Hitomi over his shoulder. "Oh, you brought her back, too," she added in an irked tone, her ears going flat on her head.
Hitomi used the other side of the carriage to get out and back on the ground. She was exhausted and thrilled that they were finally back. It had seemed like the longest three weeks of her life. Rai and a number of others were there to meet and greet the couple and knights who could only yawn and grunt in reply to many of their questions.
Rai had been the one to drag Hitomi into the castle and insisted that the woman get a good sleep before dinner. When asked how the trip was, the young queen gave a sad smile and simply said it had been educational. The older woman, having raised a few daughters of her own, went immediately to the source of gossip before going to the source of the problem though it was hard to tell them apart sometimes.
"Armand!" Rai called out as she thundered down the hall Armand's personal room was located. The brunette man peeked from behind his door in time to see the red-faced woman give him a stern glare. "What happened?"
The man, for lack of sleep and thinking, tried the innocent act. "What on Gaea do you mean?"
In a blink of an eye, Rai's hand snagged his ear and twisted it enough to hurt without being extremely painful while she yanked him out of the room.
"Ow! Owowowowow!" Armand sang out, squirming under the nails, and pressure of his captor. "What is wrong with you?"
"With me? What's wrong with me?" She hissed. "Have you seen the Queen? Have you even realized in all your maleness that something is wrong?" Her free hand was planted firmly on one side of her hips as her eyes narrowed dangerously.
"Of course I have!" He snapped, wincing as she twisted the ear yet again. "OW! What do you want me to do about it?"
"Nothing!" She glared, "You of all people don't need to be around a depressed girl."
Armand winced again, but this time it wasn't because of the ear. "So what do you want?" His voice was dull and annoyed.
"Tell me what happened," she barked, eyes blazing, "in explicit detail."
The man sighed, but gave in to her demands. He poured out everything he knew about the past weeks. Rai's eyes caught a new fire when she heard about the party.
"She was there, but she didn't make any advancement toward King Van," Armand watched as his confusion was matched in Rai's face."That doesn't seem like her."
"I know."
"But it was after this that Hitomi started to act strange?"
Armand nodded.
"She won't talk about it though."
"I think that little floozy must have gotten to her," Rai released the man's ear; he started to rub the sore flesh.
"So do I, but until she says something, we really can't assume."
The woman snorted, "You not assuming? Ha!"
She giggled and shook her head; she swiveled on her heels, and looked over her shoulder with a smile, "don't breathe a word of this, Armand." Rai advised, walking off.
The knight sighed with relief and watched the maid disappear up the stairs. Turning back to his room, he saw the young face of Jill peeping through the crack of his slightly open door. Glaring, Armand asked what he was staring at.
The younger man chuckled before giving a sing-song answer, "Armand got beat up by his mommeee!"
Jill slammed the door shut as Armand growled and stomped toward the man. When that hunt seemed futile, Armand slammed his own door and crashed into his bed.
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"So you see, your majesty," the councilman smiled, "everything has been going smoothly."
Van flipped through the large stack of notes and books of numbers the counselors had given him to look over. His face remained neutral as he slowed his pace and an eyebrow rose. Putting the book aside, he looked steadily at the last counselor to speak.
"You've all done well," he commended and they were wise enough to move, crack a smile, or laugh. "But the trade from Asturia has spiraled downward. Why is this?"
They looked nervously at each other, before one man swallowed heavily and stepped forward.
"After the kidnapping of the Prince of Freid, they have made security tight around both kingdoms making it near impossible to get anything in or out of the country."
That didn't make sense, every country could be self-sufficient, but due to the rather heavy population of Asturia it usually required importing more food than the country could produce on its own. Chid's missing really shook them to the core. Whoever did this was trying to make those kingdoms die. Probably weaken them enough in order to strike when they wouldn't be able to fight back with any real fire power.
p>Sighing, the king dismissed the members, but not before requesting the presence of Hitomi's father. He was supposed to be extremely close to Dryden, who headed up all the trade to and from Asturia and was also next in line to inherit the throne since his marriage to Princess Millerna.
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Hitomi tossed restlessly in bed. Her eyes hurt from pinching them hard. Rai's suggestion of sleep threw off her sleep cycle; this was the third day since returning she slept most of the day. Every day was growing steadily worse with her nightmares.
The same image would haunt her, causing her to wake up in sweat and tears. The images wouldn't fade away like a normal dream. No, this stuck with her as if it was burned into the back of her eyelids. Today was no different; she had fallen asleep and was quickly sucked into the world she hated to witness.
"Is he ready?" That sweet voice, the one that hurt him before, asked. Why were they being so nice?
Hitomi wasn't outside the dream anymore, she was interacting within it. She searched the room, and found the young, battered blonde boy; her heart ached as she raced to his side. He was still alive!
"Chid?" She asked, but the boy didn't hear her. Nobody heard her. She turned around, eyes eager to see who else was in this room. There was only one other person, but their face was blurred and their arms crossed. Was it a man or woman? From the clothes the person wore, there was no way to see any indications of either sex.
"What is this?" She cried out, watching the person drew closer to the defenseless boy. "Stay away from him!" Hitomi tried to push the phantom person away, but sailed through the image as if the person were smoke.
Turning around quickly, the scene went blood red. Her eyes widened as the young boy, with a smile no child should know how to make, held a knife high above his head –right in front of her. He chuckled as tears escaped his eyes, without any warning he struck, Hitomi screamed as the knife went into her belly.
"Hitomi!" The roughness of her shoulders being shaken snapped her out of that unbearable vision. Her green eyes flew open and searched frantically for the enemy, ready to fight for her life. Through her tired and crying eyes, she saw the face of her husband looking back at her.
She took in gulps of air and felt along her stomach.
"It was just a dream," she muttered out loud, as if to reassure herself. Her senses seemed to be stretched impossibly thin. Everything from the wind gently blowing the curtains to the warmth coming off of Van's hand, everything seemed to be amplified. The last thought hooked in her mind.
He was touching her.
Her tenseness ached for a break, as her mind sweated the details of the dream.
"What's wrong?" Van's voice was almost soothing as he spoke to her. Hitomi was happy to have anyone with her at the moment, but it was still him. Was he going to use this as a window of opportunity?
"I'm fine," she managed out in shaky voice, but made no move to break his hold. The answer was all he needed to hear to become more frustrated with her. He'd been coming to change for sparring when all her thrashing and crying had caused him to wake her up. When he couldn't get her to wake up by gentle coaxing, he became worried and rougher with his methods.
"Fine," Van spat out, leaving the shaking woman alone in the bed.
Hitomi noted the almost disgusted tone in his voice as he disappeared into the changing room. She couldn't help but let the feeling of sadness nest on her heart. She felt like crying all over again. The Queen was growing frustrated herself. She knew the truth about him and all the things he had done. There was no way she could over look the fact that he-was what he was. Still she was worried about Van.
Her heart growled, stomped its foot loudly with every beat, and warned she couldn't forget what else she found out on that trip!
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"You haven't spoken with her in a month?" Armand asked, astonished as he watched his king weave through the multiple attempts from his opponent to run him through. The king was a big stickler about practicing, something instilled in him through Balgas.
"What does it matter?" Van asked, blocked, and then charged.
"What does it matter?" Armand repeated in disbelief. "It matters a great deal!"
If Van failed to see that, then the kingdom would never get an heir and Rai would probably blame it all on Armand. His mother had a way of making everything his fault when it came to Hitomi and Van's happiness since they got married. She insisted he would have to create a romance or attempt to get one to blossom naturally. Given Armand's rather sad track record, he felt the least qualified for the task, but he wouldn't mention that to his mother if he was on his death bed.
"Not to you," Van hissed as he was nicked by his opponent's epee. He was able to finally disarm his challenger and sighed deeply. "What goes on between with Queen and I is a personal affair, involving just us, no matter what you say, think, or want to believe." Van used the back of his hand to wipe away the beads of sweat that sprinkled his forehead.
Armand pouted, but didn't push the issue. Instead, he went a different trickier route. He smiled and then went into his drama-knight role. "Settling it might be between the two of you, but the entire castle knows something is up. We aren't deaf, mute, or blind."
Van kept his back to the other two, but flinched. The king knew exactly what Armand was speaking about. It was only a few nights ago when, after they had gone to the bedroom, a fight ensued. Hitomi had been nearly unbearable since leaving Slena and Van had had his fill. Merle had been pestering him about what was wrong, and when he hadn't been able to answer, Merle insisted that he find out or stop being a boring person.
So he had, rather innocently to him, asked her what was wrong. When she replied with a solemn 'nothing' he decided to let her know exactly how wrong that answer was. Unfortunately for both of them he didn't control his aggravation and lost his diplomatic ability to speak calmly.
"You're lying," He had accused; this was the point in time when he had enough presence of mind to actually keep his anger in check.
"Why would I do that?" She replied, sprinkling some type of powder over her skin. It smelled really nice, like cucumbers, but that was only a momentary distraction from the fight
"I don't know, but for some reason, you've decided that you despise me. I think I have the right to know why." Still, he was calm.
All movement from Hitomi's vanity stopped. Her back went straight and her shoulders tensed.
"Can you blame me?" Her reflection revealed her pain as the tears started to form. Another distraction, but this needed to be figured out and quickly before they ended up hating each other.
Another woman hating him, imagine that.
Van remained silent, waiting for the volcano to explode. Hitomi, with enough silence, would bubble out every last thing that was on her mind, this much he had come to know.
"Can you really blame me?" She cried. "You truly are naïve to think I wouldn't learn the whole truth about your past and what you really are..."
His heart shriveled up and groaned in pain. She knew? How could she have known? Who told her about that? Names and faces whirled in his mind trying to finger who would be so hateful to betray him in such a way.
He stood there, speechless, as the ache in his heart made him regret ever bringing the subject up. Didn't they all recommend he come clean about who he was and what had happened? He could imagine the triumphant smirk on Merle's face when she learned she had been right.
"Who told you?" His mask was set securely over his features. He wouldn't let anything bother him; he couldn't let a weakness show—especially to a woman.
"One of the girls at the party, she told me everything that you did!" Her tears trickled down her face and she stubbornly wiped them away with her hands.
He couldn't say anything, couldn't do anything but turn and walk away. There was always a instant when it was best to walk away. That had been the best time to walk away. Much to the distress of the situation, he didn't let it drop there. As his hand was on the door ready to leave, Van had turned back to the woman and his eyes hidden behind his bangs, he looked at her and asked one more question.
"You don't trust me, do you?"
"You've never given me a reason to."
"Then I guess you should listen to her." Van sheathed his sword; his eyes seemed to quiver with emotion a heartbeat before it was concealed behind damned mask. It was a bit more painful than he ever wanted to admit.
"Your highness?" Armand called him from the depths of his thinking. "Are you all right?"
"Fine," he answered automatically, and grabbed a towel before exiting the room.
Jill, who had been the King's partner, looked at the door and then to the senior knight as the man growled under his breath, "I'm really learning to hate that word."
"It's fine by me," The young male quipped.
This time, Armand didn't let him make an escape before Jill felt the full wrath of the angry brunette.
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If Hitomi was going for a record of feeling bad, Merle would probably volunteer to be her coach and cheerleader. Whenever she could, the neko would remind her of just how mean she was being. The queen tried to chase the neko from the room only to learn how flexible that feline girl was as she back flipped and slammed the door on Hitomi.
"You made Lord Van upset!" Merle accused. "You didn't even give him a chance! You meanie!" She hissed through the door. Hitomi stomped her foot and pounded on the door, but when all she got were giggles of evil delight, the blonde grumbled and left.
She didn't need to hide in the bedroom as she had been. There was no reason why she should avoid living just because she and Van weren't getting along. In fact, it was his fault—sort of. She thought it was. The words he had stabbed her with caused her to rethink what she heard.
She only met that girl the one time; Hitomi wasn't even privileged to her name! On the other side, Van, who she knew for a quite a bit longer, was possibly misunderstood. However, it wasn't so hard to misunderstand the very few sentences the woman said before running off.
Her head throbbed with confusion as the headache started to take its toll on her mind.
To add to the mystification, even her royal adviser/pain in the neck Armand had been letting her do whatever she pleased without fusing or reminding her she would bring the ultimate downfall of Fanelia. Running her fingers along the wall as she slowly walked to nowhere in particular, Hitomi didn't know what to do with herself.
She'd been rather short with Van. Since their return to Fanelia, she had been giving him only giving him one worded answer, sometimes three words when she felt charitable. The three weeks on the road plus the two and half they'd been back had proven to serve an opposite effect of what she wished. Coming to a stop at the top of a flight of stairs leading down to the library and several other rooms, Hitomi sighed.
She was hurting, but it wasn't because of anything she did!
If this is what it meant to be in— this state she'd rather do without it.Hitomi shook her head slowly.
Closing her eyes she leaned against the wall. Briefly she wondered if Van was feeling anything like she was feeling and if he was sorry about his past.
"Are you sick?" Hitomi's eyes snapped open so see those stone garnet ones burning back at her. How long had he been standing there? Why was he still standing there? From the sheen of sweat on his sun bronzed skin, she easily guessed he had been practicing again.
"N-no," she answered, oddly thankful he was talking to her.
He nodded and began to walk away, dabbing his face with the towel he'd slung around his neck.
Biting her lip, Hitomi took in a quick breath, drew upon her tired strength, and by the time the words came to mind, she had to shout them down the hall.