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Reviews on Invincible by Araya


Review by Loki 2008-04-15

This was simply beautiful, a romantic snapshot of a pairing I love, Setsuna is one of my fave characters and this ficlet was amazing!

I loved the way you wrote her Araya-chan, she was definitely sexy, loving and wonderfully human. I like the closeness and vulnerability and also the description of Setsuna's hair touching the floor -- magic!

A couple of little things: when we breathe, there is the extra 'e' when we take a breath, we lose the extra 'e' :D

But the look in his cobalt eyes *were* (should be, 'was' 'eyes' in this context seen as singular. unrelenting rhythmically, I think, or rhythmic, can't remember quite, but a typo there. :D

But in all I simply adore this treasure! *hands you a cup of coffee and a time key* =^_^=

Author's response:

Setsuna is one of my favorite characters too! :) And I've always felt that there could have been something between Mamoru and Setsuna had their fates been different. I'm really pleased you loved how I wrote her because we rarely get to see anything other than the time guardian side of her.

Thank you for your review! And I'll be sure to fix my mistakes! What would I do without you? =P
Review by Loki 2008-04-15

This was simply beautiful, a romantic snapshot of a pariing I love, Setsuna is one of my fave characters and this ficlet was amazing!

I loved the way you wrote her Araya-chan, she was definitely sexy, loving and wonderfully human. I like the closeness and vulnerability and also the description of Setsuna's hair touching the floor -- magic!

A couple of little things: when we breathe, there is the extra 'e' when we take a breath, we lose the extra 'e' :D

But the look in his cobalt eyes *were* (should be, 'was' 'eyes' in this context seen as singular. unrelenting rhythmically, I think, or rhythmic, can't remember quite, but a typo there. :D

But in all I simply adore this treasure! *hands you a cup of coffee and a time key* =^_^=


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