|
Review by Bella*Luna |
2007-06-13
|
Alright, this story was good in a sense that it made me want to finish it. I would read the next paragraph and want to know what ws going to happen next. The story progression was good, it sort of felt like I was reading an episode.
You did a good job summing everything up and bringing the story to a close. You kind of lost your characters from the middle and on though. I don't think that Luna would have been as harsh with Serena after finding out that she had lost her memory. I'm fairly certain that Sailormoon wouldn't have beat the crap out of Tuxedo Mask in an effort to find out where Darien was (she is inherantly gentle, after all). But you did find them again in moments, so that was good.
Other than that, you've got some grammar and spelling issues (Youma is spelled wrong every time) and since you're using the dubbed names it might have been a better idea to call them monsters instead of Youma.
It was a good story though. I really enjoyed it. I kept getting interrupted and that was irritating me because I wanted to know what was going to happen. Good job. ^.~
|
|
