Jude sat on the front steps of her house, bathed in the glow of the yellowed house light above her. Her thoughtful eyes watched Tommy drive away, the tail lights of his blue Viper growing smaller as he moved down the street. She looked away and stared at the gift she had just been given, felt it with her hands, remembered every detail of the plain, plastic disc.
In Tommy’s reasonably neat scribble, Jude read her name and the venue she had just played. The exhilaration of being on stage coming back over her as she held the CD in her hands. Using it as proof for herself; proof that she’s made it; proof her dream had come true. And proof that she’d made the decision to throw it away because she wasn’t willing to pay the price it seemed to come with.
“You look like you’re in a bad dream.”
Jude looked up at the sound of his voice, her sadness melting into something that didn’t have a name but made her feel worse by the second.
She brushed her red bangs out of her eyes and stared at Jamie, his spiked hair defying gravity and his square glasses reflecting the light, hiding his eyes from her. He was wearing the same clothes he had been wearing at the Vinyl Palace. She suspected he had been waiting for her to come home.
Tilting her head to the side, she reached up and handed the disc to him.
“I saw pretty boy leave,” he said, as he took the disc from her. “Did he change your mind about quitting?”
Jude scoffed and muttered under her breath, “There’s only one person who can do that.”
With a quick glance at his face, trying to see his eyes once more she reached up and began fiddling with the necklace around her neck, the guitar pick that Jamie had fashioned into a pendant. The memory of Jamie giving it to her played over in her mind. It was Joe Strummer’s. It was a symbol of how proud Jamie had been of her for going on stage the day of the contest. It was his way of telling her that he loved her. And then he had actually told her he loved her and she had blown it. She hadn’t let him down easy, hadn’t told him she loved him too, but just as a friend. She hadn’t said anything at all, she just watched him walk away.
“You know,” Jamie looked up at her as her voice floated to his ears. Jude looked at him, holding the pick up and away from her neck, “I thought this was what gave me the courage to go out on stage tonight.”
She looked contemplatively at it as Jamie took a seat next to her, placing the CD between the two of them. He stared at the guitar pick with her for a moment before she began talking again.
“It’s hard to believe that something so small could have so much power. This thing that someone who loved me gave to me.”
Jamie smiled a pained smile and turned away before Jude could see it. The memory of her rejection burned clearly in his mind, but there were bigger things that needed to be dealt with.
“But I was wrong.”
Jamie’s head shot back around and he faced Jude with a look of shock. She dropped the guitar pick back to her neck and looked at Jamie, finally able to see his eyes.
“It wasn’t until I saw you in the crowd that I realized how scared I really was.” Jude sighed then with a smile and nudge of his shoulder she said, “My knees were shaking so bad I’m surprised that I held myself up so long.”
Jamie smiled a happy smile and looked away as a blush invaded his cheeks.
“I was really afraid that you weren’t going to come.” She whispered as her smile dissolved into a face full of worry and sorrow.
Jamie sighed and looked at his friend with a sober expression, “You would have been fine without me there. This isn’t about us anymore. Like Tommy said, your fans aren’t going to care about me.”
“That doesn’t mean I don’t.” She said quickly her voice cracking a bit in an effort to stress her point.
Jamie shook his head and sighed again but didn’t say anything. He picked the disc back up and studied it some more, trying to think of something constructive to say.
“Look, I made a promise to you at the beginning of all of this and I’m going to keep it. I’m not changing for anyone, least of all Little Tommy Q.” When Jamie still didn’t look at her, Jude grabbed him by the shoulders and turned him toward her. She had been thinking about what to say to him for the past four hours. She wasn’t about to let him ignore her when she said it.
“You are my luck, you’re my confidence. Jamie, you are my backbone. I can’t do any of the things that I want to do without my lucky star shining back at me, watching me from where ever you’ll be.”
“I need your smiles and your humor.” She sighed and released his shoulders, keeping his eyes locked with hers, “I need my best friend.”
It took Jamie a minute to recover from her speech. The words were heartfelt and he was glad that she felt that way. He was afraid that he had scared her off completely from his confession of love before.
“Jude,” he paused and placed the CD on the stoop again and sighed as he stood up to look at her, “nothing is going to happen to us. I love you. I’m not going anywhere.”
Jude sighed and looked up at him, his eyes were hidden again but she didn’t think she wanted to know what they said.
“So you’re with me?” She asked with a small grin as she lifted the CD from the concrete stoop beside her.
He looked at the CD in her hands and then knelt before her, “I’m with you Jude.” He smiled at her with a crooked grin and then lightly punched her in the knee, “After all, what is an artist without their lucky charm?”
Jude’s smile spread from ear to ear, her happiness radiating from her sparkling eyes, making Jamie’s heart flutter. She breathed out a deep sigh of relief and grabbed Jamie by the hand, dragging him behind her and into the house so that they could listen to her first CD. She didn’t love him now, but she would; he just had to stick it out until she saw him the way he saw her.
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"Lucky Star" copyright 2007 by Bella Luna (beautifulmoon29@aol.com)
Instant Star and its associated characters copyright Linda Schuyler and Epitome Pictures.
The text of this work was created by Bella Luna (beautifulmoon29@aol.com) and is her exclusive property. It is not to be used without her personal permission.
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