General Library: The First Night by AngelMoon Girl

Rating:PG Created:2009-10-04
Genre:Romance Updated:2010-04-21
Style:General Status:Complete

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One shot. After consummating their marriage, newlyweds Usagi and Mamoru face their own breed of fear, be it homesickness or insecurity. Lucky for them, true love conquers all... even wedding night jitters.

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 Reviews: 1
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Review by Loki 2009-10-07

You are a very good writer: plot, style and flow, characterization etc, very good.

Careful of punctuation, ellipses, apostrophes are also a good sub for italics. Show and not telling in a couple of places, but these are cosmetic things I noticed. Over all a most enjoyable and cute ficlet, portraying a pure love, sweet, innocent and passionate and you pulled it off to perfection. I can see you continuing to grow and improve as a writer. ^_^

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